Again, I can hear Him saying "Just come. Approach my throne of grace with confidence. Run with perseverance the race that is set before you, looking to me."
How often do I not start running the race I'm not "ready." Even more so though, how often do I attempt to run this race without looking to Him, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith? He did it first. He modeled so perfectly, and yet I try to do it without him. We don't have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weakness! He was tempted in every way, yet did not sin. Every way. Like Barhigh said, staring at His face, looking towards him, compels us to run that with passion. Instead, I often think I need to start running, and run with some level of proficiency, before I can catch of glimpse of His face.
All this talk of running races brings to mind "Underdog" by Audio Adrenaline. The whole song is rich with what I've been meditating on, so here it is.
I am so weak and I'm so tired
It's hard for me to
Find enough strength to feed the fires
That fuel my ego
And consequently all my pride has all but died
Which leaves me
Down on my knees
Back to the place I
Should have started from
[CHORUS]
Been beat up
Been broken down
Nowhere but up
When you're facedown
On the ground
I'm in last place
If I place at all
But there's hope for this underdog!
That's the way, uh-huh, we like it!
That's the way, uh-huh, we like it!
You can call me the underdog
I'm in this race to win a prize
The odds against me
The world has plans for my demise
What they don't see
Is that a winner is not judged by his small size
But by the substitute he picks to run the race
And mine's already won
He's already won! It is finished! Hallelujah!
I have such a hard time in my imagination staring into the face of Christ. But when I do, I never regret it. I think that's the excruciating pain of mercy. There's a terrifying element to mercy. When I gain the momentary courage to seek His face I'm instantly thrust into a position of extreme unworthiness. It's a bizarre conundrum that leaves my brain/heart asking, "how could such extreme tenderness engender such extreme pain?" His eyes then usually smile repentance and forgiveness into my person and I am glad that I trusted Him.
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